This support group brings men together to talk, mentor, and connect over challenging topics

The men’s group. (Photo: Rasheed Z. Ajamu)

On a cold night at Awbury Recreation Center, a group of about 25 men gathered around in a circle. The majority of the group are Black men of varying ages and varying professions. Some of them were laughing. Some of them were quiet. All of them were alert and engaged. They were there to talk and to listen. 

This is the Men Empowering Men support group, facilitated by Chris Gordon, and hosted by Balancing Life and Kids Inc., directed by Kishna Celce. 

The evening’s topic was Recycling Trauma. It’s heavy. But, even after the discussion, the men were in good spirits, smiling, and connecting with each other as they left the center. 

Creating the support group

Kishna Celce left an abusive relationship, which started an entirely new journey for her. In 2019, she became the founder and president of Balancing Life and Kids, Inc., focusing on social, emotional, and mental health development for all ages. 

People have asked Celce why she would care about creating a support group for men, especially dads, when she had such a bad relationship with the father of her children. Celce said she has so many great men and dads in her life, from her cousins and friends to her husband.

“I know a lot of great men in my life. I have great male friends. I have great male mentors. And again, they were looking for support, and they were not able to get that support. So I wanted to be able to create an outlet for them to receive the support, the guidance, the mentoring, whatever it was that they needed from other men,” said Celce.

Enter Chris Gordon, a social worker and therapist, father, and creator of a non-profit called 24/7 Fatherhood for teenage fathers transitioning from prison. He was connected to Celce from a mutual friend, and found out that Celce was hiring a facilitator for a new men’s support group that she wanted her organization to host.

Gordon, from a Jamaican background, grew up in Philly without a real father figure and a mom who worked multiple jobs. He said much of what he went through growing up pushed him into helping people, especially young men like himself. When he became a father, he saw how much he and other men wanted and needed support around fatherhood.  

Gordon interviewed for the job, and Celce knew they had the same vision, feeling like they were meant to be working together. After he was hired, they started looking for a location, and Gordon built the group into what it has become today.

Connecting to the people

The group started in January 2024 at Awbury Recreation Center. It’s been steadily growing, with at least 20 or more men bi-weekly, and Gordon says there’s always someone new who has heard about the group through word of mouth. 

This past night at least five new people were there. They were discussing the topic of Recycling Trauma. It’s something Mike Duśon feels intimately. 

Duśon started attending the group from the beginning, knowing Gordon from the counseling work they did together with one of the youths on Duśon’s caseload.  Duśon works on a regular basis with youth who are going through probation. Tonight’s topic hit home. 

“So my recycling trauma today is my son, that’s 32, is serving a life sentence. And I’m a juvenile probation officer, mind you, that I told you. So when I’m dealing with kids on my own caseload, that’s getting shot or shooting somebody else, that’s re-triggering my current trauma. So me dealing with my past trauma growing up, I learned how to deal with that. But current day, this group is actually helping me deal with current day trauma,” he said. 

It’s something he voluntarily shares, and he finds solace in the different men and their stories and perspectives. 

Gordon knows that sharing personal stories helps the men feel trust, even when talking about trauma. 

“It’s hard because even within myself, I have my own trauma. And… this class is not just for them, it’s for me, issues that I’ve been through and hearing their backstories on it, how they got out of it. So it works hand in hand,” says Gordon. 

Gordon has a strong network that follows him on his 24/7 Fatherhood Instagram, but he also connects to people at church, from his college years, and his multiple jobs. He tells the men who follow him to tell five people they know. He said he probably has a rotation of 120 men that come out regularly. And they tell their friends, their family, and their community. 

The topics come from the men themselves in the group, ideas that Gordon himself has been thinking about or listening to, or topics he feels are relevant and affect people on an every day basis. 

Some topics they’ve covered include co-parenting, what it means to be a husband, the effects of social media, and the difference between being masculine and being an alpha male. 

It’s bigger than just a group 

Gordon knew the group was meant for something bigger when they talked about the true definition of pride in an earlier meet-up. During the session, he asked each of the men to exchange numbers, and during the week, they had to reach out to at least one person in the group about something they were going through, and it had to be someone random that they didn’t know. 

After that, Gordon said the group reached a new level of trust, something he still feels today. 

Alan Byrd is a police officer who heard about the group through his neighbor. He has held cookouts on his back deck and would get together with five or six guys to talk about religion, politics, and the cultural climate of the day. When he heard of the group, which felt like something he was already doing on a bigger scale, he was all in. 

There’s a comfortability and familiarity about talking to other Black men about different topics, Byrd said. He said that sometimes it’s easier to understand and accept things coming from your own community. 

Another support group participant, Cedric Wise, also felt the group’s acceptance and lack of judgment when talking about sensitive issues. Even though the men might disagree on topics, it’s a practice that lets them sit with different perspectives. 

“One day I came in and told everybody how I just was burnt out from having to do so much work, kids, you know, being married, all that stuff,” he said. 

He continued, “So I gave them that, and they gave me back a whole bunch of positives and like, ways I can release or ways I can kind of like regain myself. You know what I mean?”

Tyreek Brown is a case manager and peer service supervisor at Healing Hurt People. He and Gordon went to college together. He has seen Gordon’s work for years, hosting similar groups even back in college.

Gordon brainstormed ideas for the Men Empowering Men group with Brown, and they both witnessed its growth. 

For Brown, it comes down to the fact that mental health matters. And so does a sense of community. 

“And the biggest thing is taking the time to be open with one another. Even if you don’t agree on things, meeting people where they are,  and seeing things from different vantage points where you’re able to then talk about it. You might not agree with things, but then you still could talk about it openly and effectively,” said Brown. 

The Men Empowering Men support group is free and meets bi-weekly at Awbury Recreation Center. You can learn more about it and follow updates through Chris Gordon’s 24/7 Fatherhood account.