Our best mental health tips – backed by research

Feeling very upset can interfere with our lives, making it hard to think clearly or work, relax, study, sleep or deal with other people.

Many of us will know when we’re upset but not be sure what we’re feeling. Is it sadness, fear, shame, loneliness, anger or something else? We don’t always know why we’re feeling that way.

It often helps to give our feelings our attention without judging them, without telling ourselves we’re stupid or weak to feel the way we do. It may seem strange and uncomfortable to do this. But practice and patience with ourselves will help.

Naming what we’re feeling is also likely to help. So, we can say to ourselves: “I’m feeling really irritable today but also sad.” Another helpful step can be to work out what has led to us feeling this way – might it be a disagreement or disappointment that you’ve had? Some women might find that their periods sometimes (or always) affect their moods.

Talking kindly to ourselves, in the same way, we might reassure a small child we care about, is also important. It can be very comforting. You might feel uncomfortable initially, but give it a go – it might just help.

Some people feel better if they write down their feelings in a notebook or on their phone. You might want to think about how to protect your privacy before doing this.

You could try repeating something positive about yourself a few times each day. (This is sometimes called a “mantra”. “I am on a journey, growing and developing”, for example.) Research shows this reduces negative thoughts and feelings.

Some people also feel that an activity called “mindfulness” is helpful. Talking with someone else can also be helpful – and that’s our next suggestion…

Get more tips by reading our tips:

How to understand and manage your emotions